My previous blog entry was all about the pursuit of happiness. It grew out of a general sense of the need for us, as individuals, to create a context within our lives which allows us to make the best choices as we move forward.
Right here and now we can feel fantastic about ourselves, enjoy life to the full (it sounds so trite, yet it's such an admirable aspiration!), live in a way which gives us a sense of belonging in our own lives (if you don't feel like that, you'll know exactly what I mean).
Many people working at the 'life coaching' end of personal development are fixated on concrete goals. That seems to be the purpose of the coaching - gotta have a goal and then you know where you're going. Everything you do should be a step on the journey. I'm well acquainted with that approach, I've used it as a way of helping people move forward on innumerable occasions.
What I am increasingly realising however is that the most powerful work I do is helping people right here and now change their lives so that they are living in the most authentic way they can - i.e. happy, confident, true to themselves.
A friend and fellow coach said to me just the other day, 'I'd HATE to know what I'm going to be doing in 5 years time; what about all the good things I might miss on the way to the thing I think I want now. I might miss the stuff that's round the corner.'
Think of it this way - your goal is to get to the end of the road - you can do it, you've just got to keep walking. It's a long road so you need to be fit, you need water and some food to sustain you, but essentially you have to simply put one foot in front of the other and in time you'll get there. Easy peasy. And, er, dull! Uninspiring, unadventurous and oh so limiting.
How about if you set off on that journey living life really well, feeling great about yourself, confident, happy, bursting with curiosity and enthusiasm. You walk down the same road, but for you there are opportunities around every corner, your life is an adventure - you can pop down side streets, for who knows what delights are there. Ultimately you may decide that there is another, far more life-enhancing path to follow, one which you'd have missed if you'd stayed focused on getting to the end of the road.
It's early days in my thinking, so I do hope that makes some sense. What I know for sure is that when I look back over the clients I've worked with in the past few months it is the 'here and now first' approach which has ensured the greatest personal change for people.
I'm not saying don't have medium and long term plans, what I am saying is 'focus first on the here and now'. By really getting a grip on your life today, this week, this month, you open up the possibilities beyond your wildest 5-year plan!
